Five Tips on Surviving Divorce

Divorce is like being airdropped into an unfriendly foreign country. You’ve heard others talk about their dreadful experiences, yet until you go there yourself you can’t begin to imagine the harsh, unfamiliar landscape and the warped sense of time. Here are five suggestions that can help you acclimate faster.

1. Find good representation. It’s critical to find a lawyer that’s the right fit for you. Your friends’/relatives’ attorneys may not be suitable for your situation. Instead, ask other professionals, such as divorce coaches, for their recommendations. Meet with at least two or three attorneys - as many as it takes to find one in whom you have complete confidence and trust.

2. Listen to your attorney. He/she has spent time creating a plan and a strategy for you. Don’t disregard it, or you’ll make your attorney’s job harder and increase your billable hours. If you’re concerned about some part of the plan or if you need clarification, by all means bring it up. But you’ve paid for expert advice, so follow it.

3. Avoid oversharing. Absolutely, turn to your family and close friends, but for support, not guidance. Don’t discuss your legal strategy with people you know. If you do, you’ll only be confused by all the conflicting advice you’ll receive.

4. Recognize that divorce moves at a snail’s pace. The legal process is, simply put, slow. Phone calls may not be returned as quickly as you’d like. Your attorney is spending time in court, at meetings, and connecting with the opposing attorney. Accept your lack of control over this process and you’ll reduce some of your frustration.

5. Eat, sleep, exercise, LIVE. Don’t sit around and stew. Make it a priority to stay healthy and active. Your mind will be clearer and the time will pass more quickly.